Issue #14
That’s very britishcore of you🇬🇧🍻
Apparently, thanks to Oasismania, the latest trend on TikTok is embracing the funniest bits of British culture as if they’re the epitome of high class.
As much as the rest of the world loves to say that Brits don’t have their own culture (arguably true) there are some things that are so quintessentially British that people have no choice but to say ‘actually, yeah, you’re right’.
So what are they?
Well, The Guardian (linked above) has listed the 100 best manifestations of Britishcore. I’ll pick out some of my favourites and also mention some of my own that I feel have been missed out of the, admittedly, highly accurate and highly British list.
Sending up a cheer whenever someone smashes a glass in a pub.
I have truly never heard of anywhere else doing this. Why we, as a nation, find it so amusing is beyond me. But, having worked in a pub for quite a while, I can confirm this as an absolute fact. The tinkling of broken glass hitting the floor accompanied by a chorus of ‘WHEEY!’ feels like something that should be sent into space to teach aliens about our culture.
Having your food nicked by a seagull the size of a small dog
If you’ve ever visited a beach in Britain (the specific beach is irrelevant) you’ll understand this. Fish and chips on the seafront may sound like a quaint thing to do on your caravan holiday (caravan holiday, also Britishcore) but the reality is different. It’s more like scranning half your food as quickly as you can, while burning the roof of your mouth, and then legging it down the promenade to escape seagulls the size of a small Yorkshire terrier.
I don’t know if any of you have been dive-bombed by a hungry seagull, I have. At that point it’s honestly best to just chuck your remaining chips as far away as you can and just settle for a meal deal from the local Sainsburys.
Big Tescos
This is one that wasn’t on the Guardian’s list but I think it deserves a place. Talking to my friends who have little experience of British culture, the concept of the Big Tescos mystifies them. Not the fact that it exists (obviously, other countries have big supermarkets) but the weird reverence we have for it. And specifically Tescos, I’ve never heard anyone go ‘oo fancy a trip to the big Morrisons?’. I’ve no idea what it is about Big Tescos that’s so cool, but it’s an event when you get to go shopping in the Big Tescos.
Inability to dress for the weather
This, mostly, seems to be uni specific. I can’t count the amount of times I went on a night out at uni in January wearing nothing but a minidress and trainers. Brits seem to take the path of least resistance more often than not, and on a night out that means a) wearing the least amount of clothing possible and b) not taking extra things you either have to put in the cloakroom at a club or risk losing halfway through the night.
The ‘tacky chunder’
Kind of gross, but this one sparked a conversation on Twitter not that long ago.
Like the Romans, British people have developed a system in which, while out drinking, they will force themselves to vomit so that they can carry on drinking without passing out and/or suffering from alcohol poisoning. It’s effective, if extremely gross.
I’ll stick with these five, but feel free to tell me your own examples in the comments.
And that’s that on that🫡
xoxo curiosity curator👀